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Now that I have some subscribers, I think I’ll reiterate some of the main ideas from Never Split the Difference to make sure we’re all on the same page.

One of the most effective techniques for everyday negotiation is labels.

Labels are a communication strategy that defuse negatives and reinforce positives.

One of my clients has used labels in conversations with his teammates, a tense situation with his boss, and sometimes when his son will come home from school and have emotions that he can’t explain.

Labels make the other person feel more understood.

So, what is a label?

A label is a single-sentence observation, question, or statement phrased similar to “it sounds like…”, “it seems like…”, “it feels like…”, or “it looks like…”.

Some examples:

It seems like there’s something about this you’re not comfortable with.

It sounds like you have some hesitation about doing this.

It feels like you’re excited about having another kid.

It’s important to leave a few seconds of silence to give them the opportunity to respond to your label because a label prompts the other person to respond.

I’ll talk more about the pitfalls that people often encounter when they start using labels tomorrow.

Josh

P.S. I realized you can’t reply to these emails, but can only comment on my posts. I will try to fix that oversight as soon as I can.