-
She said she had it under control.
She said she had it under control. She didn’t. My client had just been pulled into a meeting with his boss and a teammate and was essentially told, “Fix this”. She said had the project under control, but a few days later told his boss that she was overwhelmed and couldn’t keep up. What happened?…
-
He’s not listening.
He’s not listening. I’ll try again. I was on a call with a friend, but he wasn’t listening. I would say something and he would take a full minute to respond within “yeah.” or something similar. It was obvious that his mind was elsewhere. From the conversation that we did have, I was able to…
-
Every Tool is Not a Hammer.
Imagine someone believes a hammer is the right tool for every single job in their house. They take this concept so far that they try (in vain) to wash their window with a hammer until the window is broken. That’s what it’s like if you overuse a communication technique. When you’re first starting, it’s fine…
-
Brainstorming Labels
Today’s lesson is a 60 second exercise. Say or write down as many labels as you can in 60 seconds. Think of it like playing Jeopardy, you’re phrasing your sentences a certain way. “It seems like…”, “It sounds like…, “It feels like….”, “it looks like…” Any of those will do. Set a timer for 60…
-
The Label Game
The Label Game will help you apply, rather than just understand, the concepts we’ve been learning. Click here to listen (4 min). This “game” was adapted from a technique shown in a recording of a Black Swan group workshop. Thanks for reading and listening! Do you want to share any insights gained, or any questions…
-
Mirrors
Mirrors keep people talking and help them trust you more. Here’s a crazy story about a mirror, and how you can use them yourself. We’re doing audio (4 min) today because tones are involved. Click here to listen. Tilt your head if you have a hard time getting the pitch right for your mirror.
-
Negotiation Tones – Part 2
Yesterday, we talked about three tones from the book that you can use in negotiations: 1. The Smiling Voice 2. The Late-Night FM DJ Voice 3. The Questioning Voice I gave an example of when you could use the Questioning Voice yesterday, but not the others. The Smiling Voice is a good default voice for…
-
Tones in Negotiations
Today’s email is going to be an audio because I’m talking about three different tones you can use in negotiations.Click here to listen. If you’re just joining in, you may want to check out the initial email on labels and another on common mistakes you can make with them. Josh
-
Common Mistakes with Labels
I annoyed a family member by talking too much about personal finance and offering unsolicited advice to them. They had their guard up and didn’t want to talk about it. When I learned about Never Split the Difference, I used a label with them that went something like: “It sounds like you don’t think there’s…
-
Labels (A Review)
Welcome! Thank you for subscribing! Now that I have some subscribers, I think I’ll reiterate some of the main ideas from Never Split the Difference to make sure we’re all on the same page. One of the most effective techniques for everyday negotiation is labels. Labels are a communication strategy that defuse negatives and reinforce…