Category: The Why Conversation

  • Story: Using Mirrors to Build Deep Empathy

    Mirrors are another tool to build trust quickly. They take advantage of the fact that people like (and trust) people like them. This is the story of how a mirror triggered a client to tell a personal story (shared by permission). We’re doing audio today because we’re talking about vocal tones. If you prefer to…

  • Common Mistakes with Labels

    I annoyed a family member by talking too much about personal finance and offering unsolicited advice to them. They had their guard up and didn’t want to talk about it. When I learned about Never Split the Difference, I used a label that went something like: “It sounds like you don’t think there’s anything you…

  • Building Trust with Labels

    Earlier this week I promised to cover labels as a tactic you can use in Why Conversations. Labels are a communication strategy that defuses negatives and reinforces positives. They make the client feel heard and understood. A label is a single-sentence observation, question, or statement phrased similar to “it sounds like…”, “it seems like…”, “it feels like…”, or “it…

  • Are you Self-Oriented or Client-Oriented?

    A client told me a story of a guy he liked, who had helped him in his career, but was self-oriented. He looked out for his own interests first. He could never quite trust this man and always had to have his nonsense detector alert for trouble when dealing with him. You don’t want people…

  • The Gap

    Everyone has a gap. A gap between where you are and where you want to be. A good Why Conversation tactfully reveals and emphasizes that gap. “It sounds like…” “It sounds like you feel like you’re working too much while barely breaking even.” “It sounds like the idea of being in the same place with…

  • More Resources for the Why Conversation

    Here are some additional resources you can explore to have better Why Conversations: Jonathan Stark’s introduction (11 minutes): https://podcast.ditchinghourly.com/episodes/the-why-conversation A more in-depth explanation (start listening at 8:20 unless you want “hourly billing is nuts” extras): https://www.businessgrowthbynumbers.com/podcasts/the-pricing-queen/episodes/2147526975 Learn Your Lines (how to answer common difficult questions): https://www.amazon.com/Learn-Your-Lines-What-Clients-ebook/dp/B0CSWY9LJM/ Josh

  • Why Why Conversations?

    Jonathan Stark describes how ridiculous it is to not have alignment with a client using a cab driver illustration*: Imagine you’re a cab driver. Someone gets in the cab and hands you $500. You ask them “Where do you want to go”? They reply, “I”ll know it when I see it, just drive.” The more…

  • Why Me? + Proposal Tips

    These are the questions that sound the most like you’re trying to talk the prospect out of working with you. The Why questions create objections for the prospect to explain why you are the right choice for them (or why you’re a bad choice if they’re a bad fit). The goal in Why Me? questions is to…

  • Why Now?

    The next category of questions are Why Now? questions. Why now? Why not wait 6 months? We have a big project coming up we need to be ready for. Because we’re losing $1000 an hour that it’s not fixed. Their answer will help you understand the urgency. Is this something they need fixed right now,…

  • Why This?

    When you conduct a Why Conversation you are like a doctor looking to diagnose the problem your patient has before you decide to prescribe medication. Let’s start with Why This? questions: “Why not leave things the way they are?“ “Why embark on such a costly and risky endeavor?“ “Why not do something cheaper?“ “Why not do [other…